Part 5
I was asked a lot of questions that I didn't have the strength to answer, and then I was offered hospitalization. My family told me that if I refused, they would turn away from me. In tears and misunderstanding, I went to the ward, where my phone was taken away, they gave me a bunch of pills and took tests. By the way, the tests, as I said, were good, no prohibited substances were found. But they wouldn't let me out. A psychologist spoke to me and I stayed in this clinic for another 4 days.
The euphoria was gone. I plunged into myself and began to remember the past week. I was scared to realize that I was behaving very strangely and inadequately. I just lay with my face in the pillow and didn't understand anything. What's wrong with me?!
When I was discharged, I was forced to go to groups in the community of anonymous addicts. Why, because I didn't use illegal substances and my tests were absolutely clean? I was indignant in tears. But my family, after talking with the doctor, decided that they would not believe these tests. They threatened me – if I didn't go to groups, then everyone would know that I was in a clinic for addicts. I had no choice but to attend groups. When I tried to tell the people I met there that it was a mistake and that I was actually leading a sober lifestyle, they just reassured me that I had nothing to be ashamed of, and that at first everyone said so…
Every day I cried into my pillow, it seemed to me that the whole world was against me, no one believed me, even the closest people. I began to look worse, I didn't even want to get up from the pastel. There was a deep depression. I didn't want to eat and couldn't sleep. To help myself fall asleep, I drank several glasses of wine.
P.S.The next part will be the final one.
